Why?

Rayya has reached the stage where she is constantly asking why, and why not? The second it became irritating, a thought popped into my head. Even though this is something that every child eventually goes through, I hope that Rayya never loses the ability and the desire to ask why? I hope as she develops and grows older, she will still constantly ask why? Not only, to learn the most that she possibly can, but also not to accept everything people say as truth, and to question people's theories and ideas so that she can challenge them and challenge herself. And if we bring her up in the right way, with the right morals and values and beliefs, she can constantly ask why, and decide to accept the right information and discard the wrong information that she gets fed. We really are in an overload of information in this day and age, and we get fed so much great information as a result, but we also get fed a whole bunch of crap. So as irritating as it can be, I hope that I will be able to foster the use of the word why, in Rayya's life. I hope that she will always ask why, and seek to know more, and never take anything she hears as fact. But rather that she would have such a firm foundation to filter everything she hears through, and decide for herself, and hopefully with God's guidance, what is truth and what is not.

The daily grind

In the past six months I have gone from stay at home mum, to full time working mum and I am about to go back again as my work was a 6 month contract.
It has been a great experience and I am very fortunate to have been given this opportunity through Hope Empowered, a great community focused organisation. However, it has been an adjustment not being home with Rayya every day. She has loved being at daycare with friends, but since she has begun, she definitely treasures one on one mummy daughter time much more. A little while ago when we would just be doing something together, she'd say is it going to be just you and me mummy? And I'd say yes bub and she would clap and cheer and be so excited at some time on our own. I sincerely hope she doesn't grow out of that too fast! I love time at home with my girl, and I've found I really enjoy doing things with her, that I can remember doing with my mum when I was her age. Just going to the shops to do groceries, going to the bank, and having a treat at the shops while we are there.
But as it is in this day and age, we can't survive on a single income and I am already looking to find work for when this job finishes,  although I won't be complaining if it so happens that I find part time work, especially since I am wanting to study as well.

This is my business card that I designed at work. A front and back view.

Do you know that if you even want to be considered for a home loan at a bank you need to have already saved a 10% deposit? Thats at a minimum $30,000 in cash, you need under your belt. That certainly isn't realistic for us right now, and we are two people both working full time. Is it just us? Is that a realistic possibility for others?  We are certainly feeling like we are under the daily grind at the moment. Both heads down, bums up hardly time or money for anything recreational. Is this where most people are at?
We went to a new bible study this week and it was a shock to me to find out of a group of over 10 christians, almost everyone struggled to have joy on a daily, weekly or even monthly basis, my husband and I included. It seems we are stuck, between struggling to get ahead in our own lives, not ahead so that we are rich or even wealthy, but ahead enough to get by and be comfortable. But also stuck because while those needs are all very realistic and reasonable, at the same time we are convicted that there is so much more to be worried about in this world, and the things that are pulling us down, and strangling our joy, pale in comparison to the needs of the world, and the needs of people who haven't yet found Jesus.

And this is a magazine cover that I designed at work also.

Where is the balance? How can we show others joy, if we don't even know what it is ourselves? Is there a middle ground between seeking out only for yourself and your family, and selling everything and moving to a third world country and working in orphanages? Which by the way I would love to do at some stage. i am certainly not mocking the idea in that sentence. Is this just us??

Our Spring Garden Party

To celebrate Rayya turning three, we had a Spring Garden Party with friends and family. Rayya, had a ball, as did all the kids. But I learnt lesson no.1 in kids party rules;
#1 If you think your being clever, by combining party bags, and a game by having a lolly scavenger hunt where the kids collect as many lollies as they can find, your not clever, your really quite dumb and are about to make a few new enemies of parents.
But despite that, it was a wonderful day, and I am a very proud mum of my Rayya Lee

miss three

 I cannot believe I have a three year old. Something I always catch myself saying is "She's like an actual person!" I know that should be pretty obvious to me as I am the one that went through the excruciating pain of giving birth to this 'person', but she is developing her own personality, and sense of values and desires and an incredible sense of humour, and an amazing emotional awareness of herself and people around her. The other day she was in the middle of a tantrum, and decided to sit in a corner on her own, facing the wall. I asked her what was wrong, and she said "Mummy, I am sad." I said "Ok, would you like me to sit and be sad with you?" And she responded, "No thankyou Mummy, I just want to be myself and be sad for a while."
I love that she is only three, and has illustrated an amazing concept, that us as adults seem to forget, it is ok to be sad sometimes, and even more, she found a way to deal with it and get through it on her own. five minutes later she came running to me and said "Mummy, I'm not sad anymore!"
And just like that, my miss three has recognised and worked through an emotion all on her own! Maybe she can teach me how? ;)